Based on the rampant success of last year’s updated Nokia 3310 dumb phone, and the excitement already generated by the “reloaded” 8110 banana phone, a T-Mobile Sidekick comeback wouldn’t exactly be unfathomable.

But the “cult classic that changed everything” is getting rebooted into a whole new type of device “for the new millennium.” Meet the world’s first “Smartshoephone”, which is closely connected to the world’s first full body wearable, coincidentally unveiled by T-Mo precisely one year ago.

There are a bunch of groundbreaking technologies built into every swanky pair of T-Mobile Sidekicks, including an “edge to edge smart design synaptic touchscreen on the sole”, sole speakers, retractable smart laces, and easy access to your very own “no-BS personal voice assistant.”

Unfortunately, it’s all part of an early April Fool’s joke, just like last year. Not all of it, of course, with actual pre-orders underway on the BeMagenta e-store for (dumb) T-Mobile Sidekicks.

You’ll only have to cough up $65 to support another classic “Un-carrier” prank, with shipments set to begin on May 7. And judging from a number of official “product images”, the shoes indeed look “dope AF.” If only they included at least a couple of the features jokingly advertised in T-Mo’s brilliant new promo video. That poo alert alone would have made the reimagined Sidekicks sell like hotcakes.

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